What divorce is and is not

A quick search of the Internet will provide you with just about anything you want to know about divorce. Some of the information might not apply to you; some might. No matter what you have come to think about your own divorce, you really should try to learn as much as possible about the process.

One woman found out that she was pretty naive when she ended up in the midst of her own divorce. Her pastor had said that when two people are married, they don’t leave or get divorced — they work it out. She found out that doesn’t always happen.

For those who are trying to understand what divorce is and isn’t, here’s a list to help:

What divorce is:

— It is a mystery simply because people don’t like to talk about it. It can feel like you’ve failed and that is not a topic that most people are comfortable with.

— It is very hard to deal with. For some, it will be the hardest experience of their lives.

— It is humbling. If you thought that people who divorced were beneath you, going through your own divorce makes you realize that’s not the case at all.

— It is the death of dreams. You will have to start over and that can be very difficult. However, you can create new dreams and goals that you can focus on.

It is lonely. Someone used to be by your side and now he or she isn’t. That’s tough to get used to.

What divorce isn’t:

— It is not the end. Your life is not over. You will move on. You will smile and you will find love again (if you want to.)

— It is not an experience you will have by yourself. Think of it as belonging to a club. You know people who have survived a divorce and they can help you.

— It isn’t only about old memories. You will begin to make new memories, perhaps with your children, if you have any.

Whether you are considering a legal separation or a divorce, the advice of an experienced attorney can be very beneficial. It’s important to know what you want, though, before embarking on one path or another.

Source: Huffington Post, “Divorce : A Primer For All (Yes, That Includes You),” Breeanne Walters, May 09, 2016